Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Temptation?? Is It Really Killing You or Are You Just Soft???

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*I know I took it way back


I know you see me watching you
And I see you watching me
Cause boy your body's callin'
And temptation is killin me

Temptation can be a b*tch, can't it? Even still, it's nice to know that we have some control over our indulgences. Speaking as one half of a long term relationship, I'd say that temptation will always be there. It's just a matter of taking on a "look but don't touch" sort of attitude.

My dude was going out of town to none other but the dreaded, and cliched Miami Beach for Urban Beach Week, aka where Black people go to act a fool on Memorial Day. When he told me, I didn't have any qualms about it. As a matter fact, I used it as an opportunity to have one of my girls come into town, so we could do our own thing. I had jokes of course because well, who still does that?? But other than that I was cool. When people started asking me about my Memorial Day Weekend plans, I got a whole lot of "You not going with him?" or "What you gon be doing?".

Huh?

First and foremost, I don't sh*t where I sleep, and secondly I don't need for the cat to go away for me to play. I wouldn't do anything I don't have any business while my man is away. And if he did, that would be on him. With that said though, with temptation being what it is, how do we hold off on our impulses??

It's simple. Stop being soft.

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Thursday, May 19, 2011

If It Gets Any Better, I’m Gonna Think It’s A Setup

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Life is crazy, ain't it? Recently, I've gone through a lot of changes but I'll start here:

I love my social networks. They keep me in the know. I'm a pop culture fanatic and I like to be informed of all the goings on in the world at large. People may think that social networking is for the birds, but to the them I say: you're just behind the times. I learn some of my most surprising lessons and get some of my greatest lines, from none other than Twitter. This morning I woke up and I was going through my timeline and read, "Until the age of 25, you're judged on your potential; after 25 you're judged on your results"-unknown.  I favorited it.


Which brings me back to where I started. Man, I've been looking at my results and quite frankly they're not up to par. But the beauty of it is, I'm in control of my future. And if I was a betting woman, I'd have no problem betting on me.


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Tuesday, May 17, 2011

The Other Side Of The Story

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Perception is everything. Right?

For as long as I can remember I've heard, "There are three sides to a story. Your side. Their side. And the truth." My argument has always been: There's only one side to a story. The truth. Up until lately, that logic held true for me. Clearly, I've had my share of disagreements and fallen out with people. I often muse about my relationship deal breakers and things I will and won't tolerate. Mostly character traits like dishonesty, disloyalty, and disrespect. Pretty much, I can't be dissed. Well, that's not entirely true. I can because people make mistakes, and I understand that. We all do. I don't look for perfection, but I do expect what I would consider the basics. You may ask, well what are the basics?

I'd like to think that some things should go without saying, but recently I've discovered nothing is a given. I've cut people off in the past for violating what I'd call basic stuff like running off at the mouth, talking other people's business, violating trust, betrayal. You know? The biggies. Still basics though in my view. In retrospect, I realize what happened and my perception of what happened are quite possibly two different entities. I never really thought about the other side of the story. I only thought about the truth. Which I am now realizing was my truth. Not necessarily one in the same.

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Monday, May 9, 2011

Nothing Is A Given - I Gotta Get Mine

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A few weeks ago when I visited Atlanta there seemed to be a central, underlying message fighting to be transmitted. It kept coming at me from different angles, yet I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Until I did.

I stayed at my father's home and although my father has been out there for over 10 years, the Brooklyn in him is still as evident as the day he left. They can take the boy out of Brooklyn...you know the rest. The house is in a small town on the outskirts of Atlanta, but if I didn't know any better I'd think I was on Marcy and Myrtle somewhere. One morning I 'd woken up at about quarter to ten. My father was on his way out for the day and he called me into his room. The exchange went something like this:

Daddy: I'm about to head out. You want that thang?

Me: Nah I'm good.

*He pulls the thing out* (Disclaimer: it's official and registered...I mean, ya never know)

Daddy: You know how to use it?

Me: Does it have a safety on it?

Daddy: Do YOU know how to use it?!

(If by now, you haven't figured out what "that thang" is, I can't help you.)

He then launches into a full blown tutorial. Keep in mind that I'd been up for less than 10 minutes. He goes about his day, no doubt leaving me with the thing. I laugh to myself and call up a few of my friends to joke about how crazy my father is.  When he comes back home I rag on him, and tell him as much. He gives me a "girl you so naive", look and proceeds to pull up an app on his phone with all the registered sex offenders, in his neighborhood alone. He goes on to tell me about a time he was caught sleepin', that was the only lesson he needed to stay on point.

I still give him grief about it, but when I had a quiet moment to myself, I remembered how I always go in on people for sleepin'. Sleepin' meaning, off your guard. Being on point is always essential. One moment is all it takes to go from good to bad, or bad to worse. I'm thinking, This is a nice neighborhood, I'm chillin'. Who goes that hard? But the real question is, what happens to those that don't go that hard? Being in a nice neighborhood and being safe are not one in the same. Being safe is not a given.

Nothing is.

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Wednesday, May 4, 2011

I Fell In Love All Over Again...With My President

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I'm back on that Obama Kool Aid

The other night, I attempted to stay awake to listen to President Obama address the nation regarding the capture of terrorist and admitted 9/11 mastermind, Osama Bin Laden. My eyes got heavy and when sleep came a callin' I answered. The next morning I woke up to mixed messages and emotions but through all the chaos, the one thing made crystal clear was that Bin Laden had indeed been captured. In addition, he was by all intents and purposes, dead.

When someone dies, our values have taught us that we should never rejoice. Instead we should treasure the life lost and honor it any way possible. Reading through the news and blogs, it was easy to see that many were divided over the murder of another human citizen as well as who should be credited for it. I see it like this....

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