Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Are you having a quarter life crisis?

It's been said that the twenties are for "finding yourself" and figuring out who you are as an individual. The thirties are for actually putting into action the knowledge that the self discovery of the 20's has garnered. The forties are for actually reaping the benefits of the work that was put in during the thirties and actually finally accepting one's self for who he/she is. I can live with that logic. It sounds good and bodes well. But then why is it that myself and my peers, at times, feel unaccomplished and unfulfilled when, according to the notion stated above, we haven't even begun to tap into who we really are? Click HERE to read more....

A perfect example of a 20 something who is in "crisis" - a good friend who's 28 without a college degree, a man, or a career.  She lives in a room and she's living off unemployment due to the lack of jobs in this economy.  Sounds pretty daunting and borderline depressing right? I say no. Now don't get me wrong, of course we all set timelines and objectives/goals for ourselves and when we don't reach or complete them we feel like failures.  I hear so many people say "I thought I'd be _______ by now" (myself included).  Feel free to insert your own failed pursuit there.  In all actuality, the way rules are made to be broken, plans are meant to be changed.  For example, how many people are the wealthy individuals that they once dreamed of being when we were kids running around talking about "When I grow up I'm gonna be rich".  Furthermore, how many people actually end up with the career they set out to have?  Or even better, even graduated with a degree specializing in their initial major.  Not many.  Not because they've failed, but because their idea of where they wanted to go with their lives changed.

I feel like as a society, or better yet as a community, we get too caught up by where we SHOULD be.  Says who?  Don't misinterpret my words to mean that I think we should be slackers for all of our twenties but what I do think is (in the words of Kanye) we "worry bout the wrong thangs...the wrong thangs".  What we should be concerned about is actually figuring out what we TRULY LOVE to do and then figuring out a way to make a living doing it.  The American dream is not one dream.  If you're not married with 2.5 kids and the career of your dreams by's a little newsflash: YOU HAVE NOT FAILED AT LIFE.  You probably just need to figure out what you want to do with yours.  Oh and trust me, I'm practicing what I preach. *logs off and goes into self reflection mode*


Anonymous said...

Miss White,
You are SO right. I will be 40 years old next year and I am far away from my dreams when I was 20 years old. I am at a place in my life that I really NEVER thought I was going to be...I am where I want to be NOW! Life is not only about results but it is a journey and I truly believe that everybody is in the place they should be at this precise mistakes, no coincidences. We just have to think what we can learn from this situation and moment that I am right now...and if we are open to the experience we will find a lesson behind it and that there is a purpose for it.
Thank you for sharing.

MISS WHITE said...

Your comment was well said. I agree wholeheartedly and am glad to hear that wisdom from someone a little older than me. Thank YOU for sharing.